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Saturday, October 11, 2014

Dialysis

Well, it's been a couple of weeks. Every night around 10 I hook up to the machine. Sometimes I have alarms but so far they are from my exit care site and the dressing pinching the tube which means I have to "fix" it and carry on. and other than that it fills, dwells and drains 3 times every night.
I'm handling it but sometimes I'm scared about it. Every day is a new day fraught with worry, stress and trouble but I try hard not to worry about any of it. I'll deal with it when it hits me but I always have to be careful and mindful and pay attention and I think sometimes that is a real difficulty for me. I HOPE that I can stay on top of it. Is it the day when I can look back and say isn't it amazing the care I take of myself? I don't think it's today...I have ideas about what could happen and I freak myself out way too much if I think about them so I try not to. ONE DAY AT A TIME. Sometimes even a moment at a time if that's how you get through it. But...I am still alive and so far am still ok so I have to be grateful for that.
I'll post a couple of pics to show off my machine...and keep on keeping on.

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